Thursday, October 4, 2012

THE YEAR I GOT PREGNANT

I would like to take you back in time to November 2004. I had just started working at a small firm that specialized in executive job placement (it’s just a fancy name for a job agency). They prided themselves with being very sophisticated and fancy with job placements of CFO’s, CCO and other high-end jobs. I found myself being very thankful for the job since the pay was nice compare to my other jobs and the people including the boss were very nice. I remember coming home almost every night and telling my husband how happy I was at this new job and how great these people were. His response was most of the time be careful no one is that nice all the time, something is wrong. I shrug it off as him being jealous of me having a good job that I loved (I should have listened to him more, probably the only time he was right).

Anyway all thru November and December things were wonderful. The Christmas Party at the fancy restaurant and even my bosses understanding that I wasn’t feeling well after the Christmas party and wasn’t able to come in (in my defense I think something was wrong with the food and not that I had too much to drink. Yes I could tolerate my alcohol at that time and I only had 2 glasses of wine so I don’t think I got drunk from that but nevertheless the next day I felt completely like shit and I had to call in sick. Please notice that I said I could tolerate my alcohol, past tense. Since I’ve had my kids my body can no longer tolerate alcohol, although you would think that with two kids I would have become a full time alcoholic. Maybe that’s why I’m always stressed out…not enough alcohol in my system, I’ll have to experiment and report back to you. Also sometime later I realized I was pregnant at that time and I think my son was not happy about the wine. I was so relived that my boss was very understanding, probably because the bitch was totally drunk everyday after 3:00. She even gave me a very generous bonus considering that I had only been there for 2 months and not to mention that everyone made me feel so welcomed and praised me daily how grateful they were to have found me. Of course my ego was blow up like a blimp, whose wouldn’t?

New Year came and went and Welcome to 2005. Sometime around the middle of January I notice that in the morning when I woke up my stomach wasn’t as flat as it usually is. On a side note I’m a pretty skinny girl but my main problem has always been my stomach and I become obsessed with having a flat stomach (not obsessed to the point of working on, forget that shit I hate working out, but to the point that I had mastered the art of sucking in my stomach for later parts of the day when it would blow up). So anyway I started noticing that it was still a bump in the morning and one morning I downed on me HOLY SHIT AM I PREGNANT? I really wasn’t ready to be a mom yet. My husband and I just got married some months earlier and we were still trying to get our shit together, this was just not the right time. I went to work and after bought one of those at home pregnancy test. Went to the bathroom and peed on the stick and waited the appropriate 5 minutes to see. I looked and of course it had the positive sign and at that moment it was like the heavens opened up and I’M GOING TO BE A MOM. I can’t describe to you the feelings that I felt at the moment. Nothing else mattered, I just wanted this baby. I know we weren’t financially, mentally or any other way ready to be parents but something happened and I was prepared to kill anyone that harmed my baby. My husband was equally happy but we were at the same time scared shitless. This was a human life we were going to be responsible for, but we wanted this baby so much so we said one day at a time we’ll find a way to make this work.

I went to the doctor a couple of days later and had it confirmed by a doctor and so I began my pregnancy period.

On the day I decided to tell my boss I was soooo nervous. I loved my job and was really scared how she was going to react to the fact that I was pregnant and had only worked for the company about 3 ½ months. At that point I wasn’t even thinking about maternity leave (see young and na├»ve….idiot). So here is how our conversation when. Please keep in mind I don’t like to ever refer to woman as a cunt but this woman deserves nothing less.

Me: Good morning Mrs. ….

Cunt: Oh hi ….., good morning, how are you?  How was your weekend?

Me: Nice, nothing special. How was yours?

Cunt: Nice, I went (she was very rich and always did these extravagant things)

Me: Um, I have to talk to you about something.  I found out sometime last week that I am pregnant.

Cunt: Huh, um ok. Are you sure?

Me: Yes, I did at home pregnancy test and I also had it confirmed by my doctor.

Cunt: I see, are you going to keep it?

(I kid you not this is what she said…keep reading it gets better.)
When she said this to me my first thought was What The Fuck did you just ask me, but I said

Me: Yes

Cunt: I have to tell you that I am quite surprised and have you never head of a condom or other forms of protection. You’re a grown woman and you should be more responsible.

Me thinking: IS THIS BITCH TRIPPING? MAYBE IT’S MY EARS DECEIVING ME. SHE CAN NOT BE SAYING ALL THIS STUFF but what I said was

Me: Um ok. I am married and my husband and I were planning to start a family soon so we weren’t using protection for that reason.

Cunt: Is this your first pregnancy? I mean first first?

(Where is this BITCH going with this question?)

Me: Yes it is.

Cunt: I just want to let you know that I had 5 miscarriages and you shouldn’t hold onto too much hope of this being a successful pregnancy. I’m not saying that you will definitely have a miscarriage I just want you to keep that in mind.

(At this point I wanted to leap over her desk, grab her by her FUCKING THROAT AND CHOKE THE SHIT OUT OF HER ALL THE WHILE YELLING YOU STUPID FUCKING CUNT HOW DARE YOU SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT TO ME. ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY? This woman had some major issues and I realized that very quickly otherwise no sane human would say something like that).

Me: Um, thank you for the advice. (What the hell could I have said)

At this point I left the office because I felt if I hadn’t I really would have done some real damage to her. She never said congratulations. I know you're probably thinking that I'm either exaggerating or completely lying but believe me I'm not. This woman really said all these things to me.

Needless to say the next 6 months were hell to work there. I knew right from the moment I told her I was pregnant and by her reaction that I would stop working there as soon as my baby was born. The stress that she put on me was unbearable at times. The only reason I had to keep the job was 1. The insurance, I had it and my husband’s job didn’t offer it 2. I need a job, a baby was coming that cost a lot of money and 3. I was truly afraid for good reason that no one would hire a woman that was pregnant. So I took her verbal abuse and prayed for the day to come that I could stop working and NEVER EVER LAY MY EYES ON HER. During my time there she complained to me and everyone else about my eating (apparently eating breakfast and lunch at my desk was a big no no, although everyone else was doing it and me as well until I got pregnant, I wasn’t wearing enough dresses, I wasn’t wearing enough make-up, I was wearing stilettos only flat shoes and the list goes on and on. In all fairness I did get back at her in my own way by not giving A RATS ASS and doing everything she was complaining about. I stopped wearing make up, I ate whenever I could, wore only flat shoes and a bunch of other things she hated but I knew that until my baby was born she wouldn’t dare fire me.

Once I entered my 7th month she gave me a months worth of salary in advance to leave. To be honest at that point I was huge and happy to go. I took the money, filed for unemployment and stood home the last 2 months before the baby was born. It was a wonderful time. I got to sleep in and really prepare the babies room. My wonderful baby boy was born in September!!!

It has been many years since I last saw her but I wonder from time to time if I should go and visit her and tell her exactly how I feel. It will do not use but it might make me feel better or maybe wait for her late at night and REALLY LET HER KNOW HOW I FEEL. What do you think?

On a nicer note when I got pregnant with my second son and had to tell my current employer I was so nervous since I already had a bad experience previously. I walked into my bosses office and started tell her that I’m pregnant and than proceeded to cry. The first thing she said was OH CONGRATULATIONS, THAT’S WONDERFUL NEWS and than asked what I was crying. I told her some of the story of the previous lady and she assured me that this company was not like that and they would do everything they could to make me feel comfortable during my pregnancy. True to her word she did and that is why I am still here today.

8 comments:

  1. I have no idea how you managed not to tell her ass to FOAD, but kudos to you for not.

    She was probably really hurt about the fact that she'd had miscarriages and no babies, but she shouldn't have projected that hurt onto you regardless. I'm sorry you had to deal with that, but thankful you found a better boss!

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    1. I wonder how I tolorated her also many many times. At the time I was young and so shocked by her behavior that I really wasn't prepared for her kind. I think also being that I was pregnant I didn't want to stress myself out too much for fear of harming my baby. After I had my son I thought so many times of suing her or approching her but I didn't have the time for suing and I was honestly afraid that if I did approach her I would have done real harm to her and I had a baby to worry about. At the end I just realized that she wasn't worth my time.

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  2. LMAO!! 'Cunt said' MONEY! However, I would not find her, because she does not deserve your time, and she is probably miserable enough.

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    1. You're absolutely right. She wasn't worth my time which is why I probably did nothing at the end. I was just so in love with my baby boy that at that point he was the only one that mattered in my life. She was a very miserable bitch and I wish her nothing but a long and miserable life.

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  3. I can't believe the first boss was so damn callous! Best thing you could have done was leave that job. Just let her and her stupidity go--not worth starting drama over or burning any bridges. Keep it in the past and don't give her a second thought--she doesn't deserve it.

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    1. Thanks "menopausal mama"! Some people are just so so f-ing unbelievable. I agree that it’s the best that I left that place. I'm sure even if I did stay and everything, every time my son was sick or something and I needed a day off she would have given me a hard time. So absolutely the best thing that I did was leave that place.

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  4. What a stupid cunt. I don't even know how you put up with this bitch, but you're retelling of the story was hilarious!

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    1. She really was. It really took all I had not to do some serious harm to her. I think the thing that kept me there all those months was the health insurance (the hubs didn't have it at that time) and having a kid is really expensive.

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