Friday, June 28, 2013

It's My Birthday - A Little More About Me

On a sunny Thursday, June 28, 1979 a baby girl was born at 7:00 AM. Yes me, I’m officially 34 (not that I’ve been looking forward to this birthday)!! Being that today is my birthday (and I will cry if I want to and I did cause my mid-morning was really shitty; thanks mom for calling me and trying to ruin my day) I thought I would write down some things about me

What I’m proud of:

Always and forever since 2005 the number one and two on my top things I’ve accomplished, things I’m proud of, things I would never ever change in my life will be my two boys. They are my greatest joy and my greatest pride.

From all the boyfriends I’ve had (and no there weren’t that many) I’ve only been dumped once. I know this is not a great accomplishment but no one likes to be dumped.

In keep with the above theme I’ve also only been fired once.

Since I was 21 and with two pregnancies and having two big babies (older boy 9.3lbs; younger 8.3lbs) I’ve only gained 10 pounds. I’ve been also trying to lose those 10 extra pounds since 2009.

I’ve never had a major car accident. I only had two minor; so minor that neither of the cars were damaged both times and my last accident was 14 years ago.

Despite my awkwardness I’ve managed to maintain a friendship with 5 girls for the last 20 years. And not just friends really really good friends.

Being a good employee. With the couple of jobs I’ve had (with the exception of the place that fired me; it was them not me) I’ve always had my bosses tell me that I’m a really good employee.

One of my best friends had her twins on my birthday. When she got pregnant and told me her due date (July 14th) I said to her well if you go early (since they were twins and that can happen sometimes) you should have them on my birthday. So as the months progressed and her doctor started suggesting that she might go early I kept telling her it was going to be on my birthday and sure enough June 28 of last year. I know this has nothing to do with me but it’s my birthday I get to decided what’s special for me.

What I’m not proud of:

I’ve been a smoker for almost 20 years

I’ve gotten drunk (like really drunk) about 10 times. Of those 10 for one of those times I don’t remember much of the night, 2 times I crawled on all fours to get to my second floor apartment and ALL OF THOSE TIMES I’ve thrown up a lot more than I ingested. (This is all before kids.)

I never finished college

Yelling at my kids (sometimes more than I should). Afterwards I fee so guilty that I stay up at night and cry because the funny thing about kids is that no matter how much you yell at them in the morning they act like nothing happened. They still love you unconditionally. This of course makes me feel really shitty. I’m constantly working on being a better mom.

Forgiving and making excuses for my mother’s behavior for so many years. I can’t tell you how many tears I’ve shed tears (like today), how many nerves I’ve lost because of her. I use to make excuses to my kids why their grandma wasn’t coming to see them when she said she was. NOT ANYMORE! I’M DONE!

Things I would like to do/accomplish before I’m 40:

Stop smoking

Get a tattoo (or two)

Buy some kind of real estate (for investment purposes)

Move out of my current neighborhood (it’s not a bad neighborhood; I would just like something better for my kids).

Go on vacation with my friends. Girls only vacation. This has actually already been talked about and if all goes well for one week in 2017 (yes 4 years from now) me and 5 of my friends will be going on a vacation just US!!!


So there you have it. A little more about me. My husband says he feels big changes coming toward us (good things). Since he’s not a physic and I don’t believe in those anyway I still hope he’s right; we sure could use a brake for certain things.


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Thursday, June 27, 2013

Road Trip to Florida

2011. Our first road trip as a family.So there we were my husband, my mom (this was when I still talked to her), me and two kids one which was still in diapers. (Side note: Road trips and diapers go together like two peas in a pod; no really they do…NOT!!)
From New York to Florida (The beautiful Sandpiper Beacon Beach Resort a place I highly recommend) in our trusted Suzuki Grand Vitara XL7 SUV. We were all so excited. I’m personally a summer person so that thought of spending the whole week by the pool/beach in warm weather was heaven on earth.
When I started packing for our trip my husband suggested that I use a big suitcase to put all our stuff in and we would attached it to the roof BUT I thought I had a better idea of using multiple bags (my thinking was it would be easier to get something if I needed it rather than taking a big suitcase down from the roof) and filling our car to capacity so that my two kids and mom had to sit in the second raw the whole way there. I know, Mother of the Year Award! What the fuck was I thinking? Now don’t get me wrong I did realized my mistake almost immediately after we started stuffing the car but at that point it was too late. We needed to hit the road and get to Florida ASAP to start our vacation.
You’ll be happy to hear when we were coming back we bought one of those duffel storage bags that go on top of the car and the whole back of the SUV was empty. We put a bunch of towels and pillows and the kids slept very comfortably.
We left our house around 3:30 PM and by our calculations we would be in Florida by 12-1 the following day. Perfect timing since check in was 12.
I have to say considering that it was our first ever road trip with two small kids and a car filled to capacity with stuff (BTW now that I think about it what the fuck did I pack that it filled the whole car, we were only staying for a week) and my mother the whole road trip went pretty good. I came prepared. We had a DVD player with many DVD's. Coloring books, cards, food and drinks and we made it a point to stop every 3-4 hours. The kids did really well. I think they started complaining the last hour and honestly even we (the adults) were all "Are we there yet"?

BUT no trip can be complete without some fuck ups.
We did have a moment in Virginia where out tired popped. I frantically tried to call every place I could find on my navigation system on a Friday night around 10. Everything was closed. This doesn’t happen in NY and I was completely unprepared. In NY you can always find anything you need with a 10 mile radius. I guess I just assumed that it worked like that in every state. It doesn't. In Virginia everything was closed by 8PM. My husband tried to find all the tools to change the tire himself but we couldn’t find it in our trunk so we had to call someone. We finally found someone who had some kind of an accent and we barley  understood him. After the phone call finished I wasn’t sure if he understood what we wanted or where our location was but almost an hour later he did show. During that hour the kids constantly asked what’s going on, can we look? And we were just trying to keep them in the car. You know the whole highway, kids running around like crazy thing. After the guy came he told us the tools were actually under the driver’s seat but don’t say duh yet cause it turns out our tires needed a special key (that Suzuki so graciously did not provide) to get them open so even if we had found the tools we would have to call someone. $200 dollars later and we were off to Georgia where we would buy a new tire (the one we had was a spare). Another $165 and we were off to Florida. See bump $465 spent and we hadn't even started out vacation.
As a side note we left NY one a nice warm/cool May day (about 65-70). Once we got to a Wal-Mart in Georgia to buy our tire holymotherofsunwhatthefuck it was like 99 and not even noon. This I was not prepared for. Like all the saliva sucked right out of your mouth, can’t breathe, just need water now, feel like a vampire that's about to melt in the sun kind of hot.
The other bad thing was my driving. I’ve been a driver for almost 16 years. I’ve spent many years and many times driving from my house to my friend’s house in upstate (that’s 4 hours each way). I never had any issues. I just did it. For whatever reason this time I just couldn’t do it. My husband drove the first 4 hours and then I offered to drive so he can rest. I just couldn’t do it. As soon as I started driving I couldn’t keep my eyes open and as soon as my husband took over the driving I was fine. I felt like someone had hypnotized me; I tried everything; loud music; coffee; my husband talking to me to keep me company fuck if anything worked. All I wanted to do was sleep. So hubs took over the wheel and guess motherfucking what I’m up like a baby at midnight. I felt so terrible. I really wanted to help him. As a reward while we were in Florida I drove to most of the place cause wouldn’t you know it when we were coming back the same thing happened.
The rest of the trip was amazing. We had a wonderful time. My kids still talking about Florida and how it was the greatest vacation they ever went on.

So Beautiful. No that is not any of us!

This was my view from my balcony.

This post is part of Theme Thursday. See what other's have to say about Road Trips.

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Thursday, May 30, 2013

Not being able to think of a good title for this post is driving me crazy!

What’s been driving me crazy lately?
OMG I don’t even know where to start with this one.  Do you guys have time to read a book? No? Shit ok let me try to make this short.
My older son complaining to do his homework EVERY.FUCKING.NIGHT. Suck it up buttercup you’re only in 2nd grade, wait till you get to High School than you can tell me you have A LOT of homework
My younger son throwing tantrums EVERY.FUCKING.NIGHT for not giving him something sweet, for his brother not playing the games he wants to play, for eating dinner for a million other things. Dude get your shit together you’re almost 5.
Every time I ask my husband to do something that involves talking to people in English (he knows the language but acts like he doesn’t when I’m around) he gets this panicky look on his face like I’m asking him to find the cure for cancer. You’ve lived in America for over 9 years. Are you fucking kidding me? You too get your shit together!
My husband for waiting for me to do everything and then saying things like ‘you never laugh anymore”, “I never see you in a good mood”. Umm really, let’s see; why don’t you help me around the house more and then maybe I wouldn’t always be in such a shitty mood.
So much work at work lately that I have no time for blogging, Facebook or twitter. I know I know job security BUT this sucks, even my boss is complaining about all the work. Nuff said.
Facebook for sucking so much. I post something on my page and only like 20 people see it. What’s the point of having hundreds of likes if only a handful will see it?
The girl that sits in the cubical next to mine. Annoying voice, stank attitude and above all else when her son was 4 months old she was telling another co-worker that he son was so rude. Really at 4 months? Fucking drive me crazy!
White girls getting a fake tan and looking orangey. Orange is not a fucking skin color. WTF people?
The pimples on my face that have appeared lately. I’ve always had clear skin so I don’t know what the hell is going on. I’m about to take Something Clever 2.0 advice and to Proactive

Moms judging other moms. Fuck you. Stop judging. Have you guys read Insomniac's Dream lately. This is a mother struggling. She doesn't need us to judge her, I'm so proud of all that she's doing to make ends meat and to be with her boys. That's a real mother. We do anything and everything to be good moms and sometimes it only takes one asshole to judge us to make us rethink our whole strategy. Don't judge, support!
My husband is in the process of getting a new job. This would mean us moving to a whole new neighborhood. He has a really good chance of getting it BUT we don’t know when this will happen. I’m hoping it will be before the kids start school in September so they can start a new school year in a new school and it’s always better to move in the summer than during the school year. This is completely out our control but it’s still driving me crazy. I feel like we’re in no man’s land.
My period. I’m so tired of this bitch. I’ve had it for 22 years and I’m done. I’ve done my time, I would like this cry me a red river every month bullshit to stop
NY weather. One day its cold, one day it’s hot, WTF already! Make up your mind!
Celebrities making millions for doing almost nothing. Tom Cruise doesn’t deserve 20 million a movie just because he’s Tom Cruise. Fuck that shit. Millions of people are scraping by EVERY.DAMN.MONTH just to make it and these assholes are making millions just because. 
Not winning the lottery. What’s a girl got to do to win some money?! (just joking on this one but I wouldn’t mind winning)

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